feathered, flighted, winged

I'm still alive! And old!



I did not actually spend my birthday masturbating on a boat, but the thought crossed my mind. Instead, I took the day off work, drove two hours, and experienced a higher state of being at the Hershey Hotel Spa in the form of the second best massage I've ever had in my life. Goddamn. There was also champagne and horribly obscene amounts of chocolate. Any place that basically lets you wander freely about the grounds in a bathrobe without anyone batting an eyelash is cool by me, though also possibly some kind of mental illness asylum. Later that night, I ate a softshell crab that had been stuffed with a crab cake, which was delicious (and strangely meta at the same time.) It was concluded with tinkering with the new laptop that I bought for myself, because once you get past a certain adult age, any birthday joy is mostly in your own hands to accomplish. So I buy my own presents, if I really want them, or if I can't bear to let my family know what weird thing I want right now. (Man, you buy just three gay soccer films and your Amazon recommendations just go batshit insane. Yikes.) Though much thanks to the New Jersey Devils for their particular birthday present.

I read the Hunger Games, which was surprisingly enjoyable. I had pretty much no expectations for it, so it probably wasn't hard to do, but still. (I liked it better than John Carlson did. I'm linking the whole video because it contains several notable things, including Mathieu Perreault continuing to be tiny and sort of sad about being mistaken for both Mojo and PA Parenteau, Karl Alzner's fashion show, Karl Alzner confessing to stealing Chicago Blackhawk hair product, and a wild Fehr sighting, but the Carlson Hunger Games reaction is at 3:45. I love him. He's such a dumbass; it is a delight. And Alzner's comment of "I don't think we need up close facials." Oh Karl. You are wrong.)

I will be probably talking about other things now, I promise. The sports will get dialed down. Until the Olympics, at which point, God help you all. See, here are some links!

Couture Sandwich. You can never have enough links about sandwiches.

Ask A Manager. Work advice website. Even if you disagree with the advice, or don't need it, you can vicariously enjoy other people's woes.

Famous Last Words: You will lose time here, and you will begin contemplating your own death in a pleasant sort of way.

The Mystery of Why Marine Noah Pippin Went AWOL. Creepy and fascinating and sad.

Oh, and I did go on a date with the guy from the wine tasting. It was okay, up until the point he said he liked the movie Love Actually. The date became more of a gigantic pop culture argument after that. For the record, I think Love Actually should be scourged from the earth, and I am willing to fight viciously to defend this opinion. The only reason the date didn't descend into fisticuffs was that he temporarily mollified me by knowing not only every single bad Beatles film the Fab Four ever acted in, but also every Star Wars film made, even the crazy Ewoks ones that didn't involve the main cast. So I didn't punch him. Frankly, ever since the lemon guy, "no physical tussling on the first date" is actually one of my requisites.

Heeeey shipping Sam/Lucifer and eating curry!!!!!!!!!

This update was brought to you by Trollcifer aka animus_wyrmis as part of a "we visit Wyrm's place sometimes" series. omg only the curry part is true! omg.

Cover art for my novelette "Faster Gun,"  (Working title: "John Henry Holliday is Sick of the These Time-Traveling Assholes") forthcoming on Tor.com this summer.

The artist is Richard Anderson.

I'm working on "The Deeps of the Sky" tonight, and generating a regular festival of Words Word Don't Know:

luminesced, tropopause, sheeny, thicks, unnavigable, dartlike,

Meanwhile, I had a little argument with myself on twitter as to whether I should use some modestly bogus science to create a cool special effect. I went with it. ;-) Now I'm stopping because I have to figure out how the protagonist intervenes to stop the Bad Thing from happening, or how he mops up afterward...

Oh, I might have just done so. Woot!

( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. )

Enough people made vaguely interested noises in the editing process that I thought I’d talk about it a bit. It’s definitely the tedious, grim, discouraging bit of the process, but it occurs to me that you, O Prospective Author, may find it even more traumatic if nobody tells you what to expect!

First, two caveats. I’ve had…I think…twelve books edited at this point, and that’s awesome, but the vast screaming majority were Dragonbreath books, and as editing goes, that’s a walk in the park with singing and dancing and happy bunnies frolicking in the grass. Only two or three required actual serious story-construction editing, where I had to grab whole scenes and shove them somewhere else, and my editor said things like “I don’t know–this bit just isn’t working here.” In 15K, you have to get everything done RIGHT NOW, and there is not much time for subtlety. This makes them tougher to write, in some regards, but it also means that I can edit most of them in an evening. (I believe I once edited one in an hour, at about 3 AM when I couldn’t sleep.)

This is not what happens with novels. It is not what happened with Nurk, although that was certainly a very short book, and not what happened with Black Dogs and not what is happening with Bread Wizard, which is the book that lies before me, quivering, with its delicate little organ meats splayed out on the slab. (Seriously, this is kinda what it feels like. Editing is like major surgery. On both you AND the book.)

Second caveat—I would love to hear from some other authors on their experience. This is JUST what’s happened to me, and may not be universal by any stretch. You’re talking to someone who’s first book sale (Black Dogs) was less than a decade ago, and I’ve only ever been with three presses, one small, two large. I simply haven’t been around long enough to say “This, here, is universal.” So take everything with a grain of salt.

( A post about editing that I didn't edit! It's meta! )

( You are about to view content that may not be appropriate for minors. )

Two new pages!


( OH MY OH MY )

EVERYTHING IS SUPERNATURAL AND EVERYTHING HURTS SO GOOD

( HOW DO I HOLD ALL THESE FEELS???!!?!?!?! )

OH MY GOD GUYS

THIS SUMMER IS GONNA BE A GODDAMN GREAT FANFIC SUMMER

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

This entry was originally posted at http://zempasuchil.dreamwidth.org/269103.html.

....that there's going to be an Annual Booksale when I get back from WisCon, as there are giant boxes of books all over my house again.

You have been forewarned!

Also, I will be doing an r/Fantasy (that's Reddit) Ask Me Anything on June 5th. Questions may be posted all day in the appropriate thread, and I will answer them in the evening.

Because y'all don't get enough of a chance to listen to me babble...